Katy Perry became emotional as she thought back to the time when she and her fiancé Orlando Bloom were separated for almost a year.
The 39-year-old “Woman’s World” singer spoke about her relationship with Bloom in a recent episode of Alex Cooper’s “Call Her Daddy” podcast.
Bloom and Perry, who began dating in 2016, split in 2017 and reconciled about a year later. They got engaged in 2019 and have a 4-year-old daughter, Daisy, together.
Perry revealed that she and Bloom only “kind of” spoke to each other during their breakup.
“He had limits,” she said.
The singer also explained that in order to work on her relationship with Bloom, she first had to work on herself and recognize her own needs.
“We all have our strengths and our opportunities to grow. But one of his strengths is that he can step in and be my anchor when I’m falling apart,” she said of her fiancé. “Because normally I’m just like, ‘Alpha, alpha, testosterone, testosterone! I can do this, I don’t need any help!'”
“But actually I need help, I need a partner,” she continued, close to tears.
“I went on a guided journey the other day and as strong as I am, I thought, ‘No, I need, I need, I have needs. And sometimes I actually need help,'” she continued. “So it was a beautiful revelation.”
Perry explained that she and Bloom were at different stages of their personal development and approach to relationships during the early days of their romance.
“We weren’t really into it from day one,” she said. “I mean, he was in a way, because he had just come out of a long period of celibacy and had strong intentions. I had just gotten out of a relationship and I was just like, ‘I can’t do this anymore, I need to swim in another pond.’ But I still had a lot of real work to do.”
She said a turning point came when Bloom participated in the Hoffman Process, a week-long intensive therapy program.
“He went there and then came back, and he wasn’t playing this cat-and-mouse game with me anymore, and I was like, ‘This is boring, I’m going to move on,'” she said. “Because I was so used to this back and forth … I was playing games. It was a dopamine rush, right? That was what I knew.”
It was the beginning of a “really tough year” of personal exploration, Perry said.
Towards the end of the year of their separation, the singer decided to try the same intensive therapy program that Bloom had participated in.
“Then I got the tools and spoke the same language, and it changed my life,” she said. “It saved my life. Without it, I would be dead. Without this process and meditation, I wouldn’t be on this planet.”
One thing she learned during this time of self-reflection was that she relied on external validation to boost her self-esteem.
This was especially evident with the release of their album “Witness” in 2017, which received mixed reviews.
“When ‘Witness’ came out and things started to change, I thought I really loved myself and I thought I really had an inner core, but in reality that core was entirely created by external validation,” she said.
Perry also reflected on what initially attracted her to Bloom, mentioning his “adventurous spirit” and loyalty.
She also said that their bond became deeper the more they worked on their relationship and themselves.
“The more we work, the more we find the next level,” she said. “And sometimes we get stuck and think, ‘OK, well, let’s do the work, but this is going to be annoying and I don’t want to do it…’ And then we find the next level and that’s why we move on in the relationship.”
